TRUST NOBODY. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING.

maybe self destructive on my part but if you have the evidence on paper and you can prove it, stand them up.

Don't trust anyone. Make sure you present to have a boring life outside of work. They don't ever need to know that you were doing handstands on a yacht while singing Beyonce songs. Wear low level luxury and if you can, drive that beat up car to work and not your luxury vehicle.

some people might stab you on the back, so be careful, document everything and always have evidence written and if possible recorded.

be careful with what you put in writing no matter what. Do your work. use smiley faces accordingly. be kind. do not complain. win Powerball then quit

*HR is NOT your friend. *get EVERYTHING in writing. Be that person that sends an email 5 min after a meeting. "I just wanted to recap our meeting..." *don't over share personal information. create boundaries and stick to them.

Everything that matters in writing.

always remember that if it doesn't leave a paper trail (or a recording) you can always lie to make yourself end up better.

HR does NOT work for you… they work for the company. Never forget that.

HR is not to help employees it is to protect the liability of the company! Never trust HR, you will end up without a job!

HR’s function is to protect the company, not the employees. Don’t ever sign anything without reading, understanding and agreeing to every word on the paper.

Never ever trust HR and do your best to fly under the radar and only do the bare minimum to not get fired

Document absolutely everything, especially if it's coming from your co-workers. They'll throw you under that literal bus faster than you can react if you can't produce RECEIPTS!!! This is so fundamentally important, it's ridiculous how not funny it is. 😒

Screenshot is your friend

Two of them: 1. Write everything down. Keep record as you go of what you work on throughout the year as it makes yearly reviews so much easier 2. If you drive to work: keep stuff that you may forget when you leave your house in the car. Snacks, tiny bottles of pain relievers, sanitary products for afabs, extra charger, deodorant, any id badge, etc. nothing is worse than getting to work and realizing you forgot something you need.

If someone’s acting funny towards you, document it. keep a log of it in a private word doc. Note what they said or did and put the date on it.

Document every goal met, shout out/praise, and project completed in a personal hype sheet so you can justify a fat raise, no one will be able to show your value better than you

document everything, use quotes or if youre told to do something by a manager note "per x manager"

You might think some work friend is cool until they become a supervisor who is power hungry. Be careful of these wicked people.

Be careful of quiet people with attention to detail. We document and we judge.

Coworkers aren’t friends. They are just daytime trauma buddies.

If you’re a young woman, be prepared for the oldest woman at your job to hate you for no reason. 🥰🥰

criticize their doing in a constructive way and they will fire you

1. Do not tell ANYONE ANYTHING about your life out of the office, just the best minimum to make a conversation. 2.Be nice with everyone, because the person who you hate at the moment, one day in the future could be your future boss 🤝

Don’t become friends with anyone and don’t share your personal life also don’t add them on social media!

Don’t tell anyone your goals or passions, the wrong people will send the wrong energy.

Trust nobody. You’re there to make money, not friends. Use free time for courses on professional development and certifications- use that to negotiate for higher pay.

CO WORKERS ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS

no one is your friend. especially your employees or higher up. separate church and state.

Neverrrr contribute to the gossip but feel free to listen to all of it

Don’t get involved in any office drama. Work, get paid, go home.

The office will gossip more than any other group I’ve encountered

Don’t share social media with anybody. Block them before they can find you.

Not adding them on social media or saying yes to drinks after work. No I don’t want to be friends.

Do not connect with any of your co-workers on social media

avoid talking to people😅only speak when spoken to

Communication. Work hard and communicate. Some people work hard and isolate and get mad. Some people talk too much and don’t work. Find a good balance of that. Stay honest in your work and go home and forget about it.

very simple!! dont put up with additude or passive aggression! call it out immediately "hey that was very passive aggressive dont talk to me like that" they cant fire you over confrontation if you dont cuss or scream

Work only as hard as the laziest man in management…take lessons from them… he still has a job, is trusted, and does jack squat. He doesn’t work hard…why should you?

Never, never, do your best.

If you do your best, they will ask for more!

Do exactly what you're paid to do AT YOUR LEVEL and nothing more! they would replace you in a heartbeat dont bother going above n beyond. want more money then find another org.

Do as little work as possible without getting fired. Work on making yourself more qualified to move to a better paying position somewhere else. Rinse and repeat.

Even a mediocre employee, as long as they’re consistent and reliable, can (and most of the time will) be promoted.

Bare minimum at all times - the effort, the socialization, the interactions. Plot twist: you still get paid the same.

Efficient workers are punished with more work.

More work is always waiting so do a good job and take your time because mistakes are remembered way more than productivity

the harder and better you work,you will be rewarded with.. more work

Malicious compliance will get more done for you than complaining about a problem

Time theft! Doing your mental health walks on corporate time

Quiet quitting. Clock in and enjoy the paycheck

Don’t become important you will never be able to rest

One of the thing i was taught by my exbf is that you should play dumb lol, once youre not a threat to anyone, youre safe (while you should also deliver your tasks just right on time)

Don’t become important in the job.

That shit isn't urgent. Take your time.

We aren’t saving lives, so the “urgents”things aren’t that urgent ‼️. Take your time and keep a balance between your work and your actual live. Your title isn’t your identity.

True procrastination - wait to be asked

Be careful on finishing your work super quickly, because if you do then you’ll just be given more work and the expectation that you’ll always do it with a quicker timeline than most. It’s not sustainable, and then when you start to slip, you’ll have your boss asking you why you’re slacking or be presented with a PIP for doing similar level work to everyone else.

Don’t put your laptop in a bag/rucksack. just carry your laptop. That way, you can walk out naturally and it’ll look like you’re simply heading to a meeting.

have the audacity. I arrive 45 mins late and the first thing I do is eat breakfast. Not one year in the office and I applied for a promotion/manager position. I have the audacity and my output is excellent so they got to know me and can never underestimate me

Never let someone know that you can do everything, unless you want to be exploited.

Just look busy and have lots of papers on ur desk & look stressed at all times

Like George Costanza - always look annoyed so they think you are busy and overwhelmed 😂

When you leave your desk, carry a piece of paper with you and pretend to read it as you’re walking. You will always look busy.

Always have your status on Teams to Away so it never changes when you’re actually away

Add random side projects like updating email signatures, or looking at team chats into your teams calendar. You get a reminder and get to check something easy off the top of your to do list as a fun little bonus

I block out times on my schedule so I can have me time. Also mouse move when you can.

Get chat gpt to turn your work tea you can’t tell HR and get it to write you a comedic shakespearean play. You’re welcome

Use power automate and work less

I’ve started putting all my hand written email replies into chat gpt to reword it 😂 total game changer. I change a few things up so it doesn’t look AI but the senior management thinks I work wayyyy harder than I do lol

Unfortunately you need to fake it. Fake being happy in the role, take the criticism even if it was unhinged and unwelcome, set timers to get up and walk, forward or save all of your projects to a separate email just for work (I created a work gmail), if your boss micromanages you, send and tell them EVERYTHING. I mean EVERYTHING so that they’ll get the hint to back off.

Fake it until you make it.

Even if you’re excellent at your role, dont show it. Instead pretend it wasn’t easy and also faced a lot of issues. Then highlight how you solved them

Ask for deadlines with every task and turn it in the day morning of even if you finish early. Turn them in the day before a couple months before reviews

Make up a family with school age children. School functions, appointments, recitals, or “accidents” when you need a couple of hours to yourself

Pretend your girlfriend is pregnant or sister is always preggo

Make up a person to blame stuff on when something goes wrong

If you ever have to do a standard work for your position write every task as taking 2x as long as it actually does -advice from my boss lol

Inflate turn-around times. If it takes a few hours to do, tell them it’ll take a few days.

Whenever someone asks you how long it will take to do something, your answer must be double what you think it is (eg. if you think it'll take 2 days you say 4) .

Take one 40 min break every day to get paid for 135 hours a year that you actually didnt work

romanticize your lunch! Sometimes i eat lunch quick and then go to a cute lil nearby coffee shop and cosplay as someone who doesn’t work a 9-5

Don’t eat lunch on your break. Do something for yourself. Eat lunch when you back to your desk.

Start the day off SLOW!!!!! 8-9 just chit chat with peps ….. show some good face around they office …. 9-10 replies to wall 10-11…. Actually work. 11-12 do personal projects liek research trips… 12-1 chill… 1-2 lunch… 2-3 -focus on what should get done for tomorrow 3-4 “work” 4-5 close it up

Take your laptop and sit somewhere else in the office for a bit. It feels ~new~